the boyfriends that i never had

my ipod is like the boyfriend that i never had
he's faithful (wah, it's a HE) as he's with me all the time through thick and thin
and he understand me (which is rare, based on my extreme mood swings)
he plays sad songs when i'm sad
he plays upbeat songs when im in my study mode
he makes me laugh by showing me videos of friends, flight of the conchords and whose line is it anyway
he plays angry songs when i'm mad
and he always know how to keep me company: by playing my favourites: john mayer or the beatles
and when im walking alone in the dark, he plays the verses from holy quran for me so that i wont be scared
smart aye?

but now
after 2 years of spending almost every single minute together (much to the annoyance of my friends)
he's finally bids me goodbye
i guess he's upset because i keep ignoring him recently
well i have my cheeky brothers and sisiter to keep me company for now,

so i dont really need him to amuse me
i was thinking of giving him some time to rest
but apparently he's not used to having a break
abandoned by me
huhu
ok
well that's just an exxaggeration
i dont know whats wrong with him but he' not functioning well right now
and all i have to do is send him to the nearest apple store
but given that i live in the magical forest of kuantan
of course there's no apple store here
*sigh*
i will fix him someday
or else i'll die man
seriously


eversince he left me
i went back to my ex
the tiny sony portable radio
and guess what
though he's old and not as fancy and as flashy as mr ipod
he's still working pretty well
and he's been with me back in the good old days of boarding school where i'm not allowed to any kind of entertainment but i brought him to school anyway
and hide him in my socks whenever we had spotchecks
guess you never know
what's right for you
you might like something because it appears to be fancier
but perhaps the less fancy ones is more faithful to you
and the right one for you

oh what kind of crap is this
guess im just upset that my ipod's broken
but hanging out with my mini radio definitely brings back memories

the weight issue

ok let's face it
all female will have something to say about their weight at least once in their life time (and that's what we call a miracle. only once in a lifetime?? get real)
and if you're unlucky, you will meet some of them who practically couldnt finish a sentence without commenting on their/ yours/someone else's weight
"oh I dh gemuk la"
"look at my thunder thighs!!"
"i look like i'm 7 months pregnant"
"perut ak buncit dowh"

"ko cm dh tembam ar"
bla di bla di bla

look
though the weight issue is deemed as one of the sensitive issue ( u know, never ask a woman about her age, and weight)
but oh wow, they do like to talk about it dont they?

among the first things that my friends(and family members) ask me is my non existence love life and yup, wheteher i've gained/lost some weight

i absolutely loathes anyone who has petite little figure and complains that she's fat.
shut up paris hilton
you're not FAT (maybe you will after i put a curse on you)

sheesh girls
seriously
i was never skinny
and i will never be
it's a pity though
when you're a kid, lets say around 4-6
people absolutely adores plump, chubby kids
they called those kids "cute" "adorable" "healthy"
but not anymore when you're in your 20s and look like you've given birth to 3 kids

i used to not to care about my weight
i mean
i'm happy with my curves (yes. statement ala2 kim kardashian)
but it hurts when the people that you thought won't mind about your shape keep on picking about how you look like
i'm happy the way i am
i'm not overweight
so shush

i know that i'm piling up on weights now

that's intentional

i come home to eat my heart out

haha

the thing is,

as i've said before

i was never skinny

and never will be

so why bother?

i'm happy the way i am

but don't get me started on finding clothes at retail stores

they're ridiculous!

ah! to be young and free again!!

so yeah,
i'm home
home, where the heart is.
here, in kuantan.
though it's pouring heavily over here,
after 2 years abroad, there's no place i'd rather be than home.

when i'm home
it's like i'm 15 again.
except that when i'm 15, my lil sis wasnt even born yet and my grandma doesnt live here. (so everything's waaaayyy better now)

being the 15 year old that i am:
i can wake up late (and not feel guilty about it ;P)
i dont have to cook ( heck, i dont even bothered to be in the kitchen)
i just pretend that i dont have a driver's license so that they can drive me around.haha
good food is always available.
clothes are magically cleaned.
i dont have to spend a single cent on anything (which is a HUGE relief)
and the best part is i can just goof around with my annoying but oh so adorable lil brothers and sis all the time
(yes suhail, that includes you)
just a few days before, we spent hours singing barney songs at the dining table during lunchtime.
yes, that barney.
the purple dinasour with green spots.
good times.

and man, it seems that i never grow up
right now, the favourite thing that would come out of my mouth is "___, are you a goat?"
i even have the guts to ask my mum if she's a goat.
apparently, my brothers are a cow and a camel and my sister is an elephant.
cmon guys, goats are freaking awesome!

ah, it feels so good and so right to be home

oh yeah,
when you behave like a 15 year old, u get treated like a 15 year old
mum still ordered me around and scold me like a child
oh well, i asked for it :P

the third wheel

instead of going straight back home to malaysia
we've decided to have a trip to australia instead and head back home from melbourne.
so i've spend 12 days in Gold Coast, Sydney and Melbourne.
which was awesome.
australia was hot and exciting.
well, more exciting than new zealand (like duh)
but there's no place i rather study in than the windy wellington.
new zealand is such a beautiful country.
enough said.

the trip consisted of the 6 of us: 2 pairs of lovebirds and 2 fantastic, incredibly awesome girls (that's us dear aten :p)
though i have aten as my "partner", i still regarded myself as "the third wheel" during the whole trip.
lemme tell you something
being the third wheel can be boring and lonely at times
there are times when you feel like such a loser for being awesomely single

according to this month's issue of cleo (whoa, a very reliable source aye)

"hanging of a guy's arm is regarded as a sign that you're desirable and worthwhile"

but most of the times, boy, am I glad that I'm not tied down to anyone
being in relationship costs you money (esp if you're the guy. tsk2)
and time.
and requires lotsa patience (which, lets face it, I have none)

and yeah,
i dont need a boyfriend to carry my bags,
i can just ask yours to carry mine (who can't resist to help a damsel in distress? lol)
thanks dely ;P (ak xtaula kalu ko sumpah seranah ak ke dlm hati tp thanks a lot babe. and yeah, thanks to erin too. haha)


oh well
girls,
stop thinking that you need a guy to complete you.
being single can be the best time of your life if you adopt the right attitude(ayat cleo)

fin.

p/s- i actually hate this post. makes me sound so shallow. oh well. perhaps i am shallow.