it's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday

am blogging from the melbourne airport
couldnt sleep
somehow i feel that going back to welly again is way harder than the first time i came here
maybe because back then, there's this excitement and high expectations of going abroad

but right now, i feel so homesick
maybe because i feel guilty for not helping my mom enough around the house
or maybe because i miss the lil ones too much
or maybe, maybe just the thought of having to unpack my stuff(oh the hassle....) and move to a new place with random housemates and the thought of going to school for observation a day after our arrival is too overwhelming
idk
but i know that
i am kinda depressed
and sad

but i have to be strong
it's my responsibility to be here
and do my best to perform wayy better than i used to
i have to make mama proud! ^-^

sigh
goodbye my hot summer vacation
hello cool and windy education
time to go back to reality


p/s maybe it's the hormones...

can i turn back time?

the circle of life

any mention of the circle of life will forever remind me of The Lion King

yesterday,

i was left in charge of the house

since mami and papi finally accepted the fact that im 22 , not 11 anymore.

nah, just kidding.

mami and papi had to attend a wedding in KL.

papi LOVES wedding.

he would go out of his way just to attend a wedding regardless if the wedding is in the middle of nowhere or if he has no idea who the bride/groom is.

he truly believes that if we're invited to weddings, we have to attend them or else others won't come to our weddings.

heh, not that there's gonna be any weddings at our house anytime soon.

..... right abang?*scoff*

anyway,

the funny thing is

he left me in charge of the house, the little siblings and atok

he emphasized on taking care of atok

'kamu duduk rumah,jaga atok" (not that i have the slightest interest to attend the wedding anyway -_-)

it's funny

because when we were little

atok is the one who took care of us

mami and papi would left us with atok if they want to go out just the two of them(while we're in tganu)

but now,

now that atok's living with us

it's our job to take care of her

having atok here really got me thinking about growing old

if God's willing, we'll grow old too someday

and i have just realized some disturbing facts of life.

growing old is like a process of slowly becoming a baby again

you'll sulk if you didnt get all those little sweets that you're granddaughter is having

you crave to eat all the junks that lil kids like

such as maggi, chocs, colourful biscuits etc

and

you're becoming more and more helpless

your bones, muscles and joints wont move perfectly anymore

you stutter to speak

you cant hear very well

you cant remember where you put your things

you need help to move around

i once jokigly said tatih tatih to atok as she's struggling to walk

just like she said tatih to us when we're learning to walk

sooner or later,

you'll need help when you want to sleep,eat

or take a bath

and there will come a time when you have to wear diapers again.

having atok around is a reminder that we'll go through that phase someday

if God's willing.

it's also a reminder to enjoy your life while you're still young,

to take care of your health for the future

to learn and do all kind of stuff while you still can

and most of all, to do more ibadah while you're still capable of doing them.

my tok abah(from papi's side), on the other hand,

is a wise old man

and mind you, he's so hi-tech

he had windows 7 installed in his computer first before any of us did

he's way older than my atok but he still can drive around,

joke around and alhamdulillah,

he's nowhere near going senile

he's a bit of hard of hearing now

but let's face it, he's an old man

he's just growing old

and his secret to a healthy and happy(i sure hope he's happy) long life is to never let your mind go idle.

you must do something to keep yourself busy.

dont just sit around and reminiscing of the good ol' life you used to have.

even when you dont feel well,

you have to push yourself to go through it.

must always remember to keep your mind active.

alhamdulillah, how lucky are we?

to still be able to do what most elders cant' do.

i know it's a cliche but hey, we have to live our life to the fullest!

so folks,

let's hit those Scrabble,crossword puzzles, sudokus!

exercise regularly!

develop healthy eating habits!

and of course, try to recite and memorize verses of the Holy Quran as much as you can.

try to lead your young life as humble as you can.

there's no need to be all cocky and arrogant and create lots of enemies in your young days.

you won't know what's gonna happen to you in the future.

you wont know whether you're gonna age gracefully or not.

and you won't know if there's anyone left in this world who cares about you when you're old and helpless.

"Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many"

and oh yeah

having atok around also remind me that soon,

it's up to us to take care of mami and papi.

are we strong enough and patient enough for that?

i'm scared.

random thoughts while watching tv

the idiot box

apparently there's nothing good on tv nowadays
mr director,please la, choose your actors wisely
good looks does not equal to good acting skills(like duh)
and please stop using those fake,fake,fake eyelashes!
for goodness sake, you guys are actresses , not drag queens!

and wassup with series like halimah jongang or si capik (yes, thanks to my atok for faithfully supporting our local industry )
why do you need to highlight and make fun of other people's less fortunate condition?
so what kalau jongang?
the condition of their teeth does not reflect their IQ (it's an entirely different matter if the teeth is full of cavities or poor dental hygiene)
xpayahla nk kesian sgt pun kalau die tempang ke, jongang ke,
it's not like if he's tempang he is also mentally retarded or suffering from down syndrome etc

xpernah lg i dgr org ckp "sy hidup susah sbb sy jongang" or "sy x berjaya dapat biasiswa sbb sy jongang"
some of us are just blessed with poor genes

making fun of them is not even funny.
sheesh
seriously, what century are we in right now?

so what's next?

fatin albino? hamdan sepet? hamid capang? shamsiah hidung kembang?

are you telling us that it's wrong to not look like a barbie doll? *insert heidi montag joke here*

after watching these kind of series (ok i xtgk pun. it's just an assumption based on the commercials)
the children who watched it will torture their friends with unfortunate teeth with terrible insults and the kids at the receiving end will suffer from lack of self esteem and will beg the parents to allow them to wear braces
some people just cant afford to wear braces ok
and as for t he cheaper alternative,the waitlist at the government clinic is just too long.
i've been there. i know what i'm talking about.


since there's absolutely nothing good to watch in the afternoons,
i humbly forced myself to watch the AF concerts reruns
after all, i watched AF since the 1st episode of the 1st season
and i was a HUGE fan of kaer af2 (my af frenzy ended after af2, thank you very much)
sigh, to be so young and not media literate
hahaha
anyway, while watching af,
i could not help but to notice that we really have no idea on how to give a good feedback
the judges (who think that they're so smart and so otai) tahu nk hentam saje
so you think you did a great job by just by pointing out their weaknesses?
does that make you inferior?(even if you, yourself is not such a great singer/entertainer)
is that the case?

and you dont have to point out their bad pronunciation or diction everytime one of them sang an english song

please consider their background first

typical meleis would freaked out whenever they have to speak in english

kudos to them for being brave enough to attempt an english song with fake confidence

it's a good try

stop shooting them down

if you keep on giving remarks like bad pronuciation and stuff,

they might not want to speak in English ever again

save that kind of comment to future English teachers with bad grammar and horrible pronunciations(like us T_T)

i know that giving feedback is hard
but there are few simple steps that they could use:

1.Point out the strong points
Start with a positive comment. Praise them for something done well.
"What I admire about your style…
"I'm impressed with the way you ……
"I really liked how you…
"That was very impressive how you…

remember to keep your tone positive. jgnla bunyi cm nk perli2 pule.

2.Every comment that points out a weakness should also have a suggestion for overcoming the weakness
It is important to point out their weaknesess to help them grow, but remember to do it in an open, safe, supportive, sensitive environment

Use personal statements whenever possible, describing your reactions to the coaching. "I felt…", "It seemed to me…"I wonder if…"I sense

Avoid "but" and "however" - "You started out very strong, but/however… The "but" and "however" negates everything you said before. Make two separate sentences or connect them with "and."

Give honest, helpful appropriate suggestions. Point out tactfully some area for improvement.

"There may have been a missed opportunity…
"It's a small thing, but be aware of….
"The one thing you might look for is…

Be sure to check with them to confirm he/she understands your remarks, so there is no misinterpretation of your meaning


3.End with a positive encouraging remark. Never end with a negative.

"I really admire your courage in..."
"Overall, I very much enjoyed…"
"We are very pleased and lucky to have you here as..
"You have some wonderful …

credit to www.protocolplus.net/feedback.html

well, this tips could be applied to any situation that requires you to give feedback to anyone.

especially for us, future teachers.

you could not imagine how important it is to give effective feedback to the students.

whatever that comes out from your mouth will have an impact on your students.

yet another random entry from me

cheers