oh look, there goes my self-esteem....

down the drain



sigh

sejarah mungkin berulang

Those who don’t learn from
history are destined to repeat its mistakes
 
(Edmund Burke, 18thC British statesman and philosopher. A rough paraphrase)

-credit to Jono, lecture 2, ALIN 201-

tolongla sedar cik sha!
jgn malas2!

ayuh berusaha rakan2! ^_^

overconfident much?

usaha tangga kejayaan
to keep a lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it
bersakit-sakit dahulu, bersenang-senang kemudian

say what you want
if i refused to study, i refused to study
if i refused to complete my assignment on time
i will definitely leave it until the last minute
its the same for every assignments
or should i say that it's getting worse?
if the assignmnet due at 5 pm
you will see me running to uni at 4.30 pm
*mentang2 umah dekat kn. cuba kne pnjat bukit sket?*

the thing is,
i didnt know why i've become like this?
i have no motivation whatsoever to start the assignment at least 2 days before
no motivation at all
whether intrinsic or extrinsic
none
nada
zilch

and now as a result...
i finally get 2 deserving Cs today
hahaha

the thing is,
regardless of how late or how unprepared i was,
i never got a C for my assignmnet (no,I didnt mean to sound cocky ok but maybe a bit overconfident. thats why i never learned my lesson. thats why the pattern keeps repeating)
and now today
the day has come
the long awaited, anticipated C has finally appeared
and it didnt come alone,
i got twins!!
hahaha (adekah ak sudah gila??)

now here's what you call
a slap on the face
a wake up call
and very deserving so

I didnt blame fate for this
why should I?
I know how much effort I have put so far..

"Sesungguhnya Allah tidak mengubah nasib sesuatu kaum, kecuali kaum itu sendiri yang mengubahnya" (surah ar Ra'd ayat 11)

Sesungguhnya Allah itu Maha Adil
jangan kamu nk compare result kamu dgn result org laen
cuba compare usaha kamu dgn usaha org laen
ak rase
ganjaran yg kamu dpt selalunya setimpal lah dgn usaha kamu
hohohohoho

oleh itu rakan2,
ayuhlah berusaha nk exam ni!
kalau result dpt x bes,
jgn nk merungut,
jgn nk mengeluh
cuba reflect diri anda tu dulu :P
(wahhhh..jgn terpedaya dgn ayat2 ak ni.ak tidak sematang itu. td ak balik umah emo bukan maen juge. haha)

but really,
Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant.
-Robert Louis Stevenson-

so lets start to improve ourselves from now and hopefully istiqamah la yek ;P

Quote of the day ditujukan khas kepada rakan2 yg merasakan sekarang ini adalah saat2 yg sukar, baik dari segi pelajaran, kewangan maupun perhubungan :
'Sesungguhnya bersama kesulitan ada kemudahan, sesungguhnya bersama kesulitan ada kemudahan'
(Al Insyirah: 5&6)

Today I am grateful for...
my test result. I was expecting to fail the test as I was totally clueless in the lecture hall last week.My mind just went blank.I didnt complete numerous questions mind you. Alhamdulillah, a C+ is better than a failed paper. Alhamdulilah, thank you Allah.

seperti kacang lupakan kulit

"wah, bru duk oversea 2 tahun dh x pndai ckp melayu dh"
"eleh, bru bpe tahun je duk lua dh feeling omputih abis" etc etc etc etc

those are the words that we used to hear whenever someone went overseas and suddenly forget their own culture
x reti ckp melayu after 2 years
melampau gile kot
haha

anyhow, what i want to say is,
sometimes, they dont even realized whats happening
sometimes, they just couldnt help it

i've realized this a few days ago
my dear friend Z's parents came to Wellington for a visit
so I went to meet her mom
and then I've realized that something's wrong when I'm shaking hands with her mom
hurm
I just know that something's missing but I couldnt remember what it was
I could noticed that her mom lookd a bit shocked ( or is it just my imagination?probably..) by my gesture
and then I realized
that I forgot to cium her tangan which simply put, a really rude gesture
haishhh

and then i forgot how to refer myself as? I? saya? S?
seriously,
after being here for just one and a half year,
I didnt know how to talk and behave in fornt of the elders anymore
most probably due to myself refusing to go back last year
hahaha
gila mngada kn?
bru stahun stgh dh lupa adab dgn org tua kn?
tp serius,ak x bmaksud pn
ak x sangka ak bole "lupa" dgn adab kita (oh ayatku)
ak pn tkjut cmne ak bley rase awkward sgt bile ckp dgn her mom
padahal pny la baek auntie tu
and that was nott the first time i met her pun
huhu

maybe sbb dh lame x ckp dgn org tua kot?
dlu my housemate pn ade la cm ala2 mak2 kite tp die bahsakn diri die "akak" so mcamanekah?
sgt tbiase treat sume org cm akak2
x payah cium tgn
huhuhu
(ye, akak2 kt cni x yah cium tgn. akak senior form 2 mase kamu form 1 kt asrama tu WAJIB dicium tangannya haha *wink wink* )


how rude have I become?
Auntie, I'm so sorry about that incident. I didnt mean to be rde to you.huu
(bila salam nk balik mmg ak make sure ak cium tgn die la. haha.)

I wonder what my Mom would say about this?

just something to ponder on

Quote of the day:
The best thing to give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance; to a friend, your heart; to your child, a good example; to a father, deference; to your mother, conduct that will make her proud of you; to yourself, respect; to all men, charity

-Benjamin Franklin-

Today I am grateful for...
all the chocolates and fruits dedications from my friends. Thank u girls! Chocolate is a must duirng this stressful exam period. FREE chocolates! whee~~ Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah.

positive thinker? i am not.

half empty?half full? which one are you?

today during alin 201 workshop,
we have to pretend to give feedback to a student based on the essay that we have marked.
the essay was soo bad, sgt meruntun jiwa.
hati mmg kne tabah abis.
there's spelling errors everywhere, terrible sentence structure and of course, countless grammatical errors.
needless to say, after marking the essay, the page is full with red inks.
D said "kalau ak dpt student cmni, mmg ak dh tampar2"
haha
thats what I thought too.
memang mnguji kesabaran abis.
huhu

but then the tutor keep remind us that when we're giving feedback, we must also remember to focus on the positive side.
what's good?
what they can improve on
what's the strengths bla3..

and then we have to take turns to roleplay and pretend that we are the teacher giving feedback, the student and also as the observer.
putting yourselves in different shoes really gets you to think.
when i am the student, i find myself ready for criticism but at the same time hoping that there's still hope and room for improvement. when the teacher praised me for my ideas amidst my many mistakes, i feel so happy. and motivated.
when i observed, i found that the tone that teacher used, the teacher's enthusiasm and choice of words affect the student.
and...
when i took the role as a teacher,
i find it really hard to be positive
i find it really hard to give feedback without focusing too much on the mistakes.
i've tried to be more encouraging and try to praise the student on her good points but it is extremely hard to do that
and i ended up sounding so fake.
~sigh~
bg feedback pn susah ok.

but really, the activity get me thinking.
why am i finding it so hard to be more encouraging and positive?
why, on the other hand, the kiwi girl managed to give effective positive feedback?

this is not the first time i realized the differences.

last year, during my first ever tutorial,i was startled to find the tutor to be so enthusiastic and encouraging.
she never failed to say "good point", "excellent", "fantastic" etc eventhough thats not the correct answer or biase2 je.

can i say that its because of our cultural differences?
we're not really a bunch of positive people.
like in school, if we did not give the exact answer that the teacher wanted, the teacher would simply said "no" and won't praise you a bit for the effort that you've made. (it's disheartening aye?)
or
like us, in real life,
it's easy to talk about others negative qualities than the positive ones
for example,facebook
you tend to comment on the picture only when there's something wrong with the picture rather than complementing how good the others look in the picture. ( maybe not everyone do that. but me and friends tend to do that. but yeah i know, we didnt do it out of spite, thats just how our friendship works. pretty weird i must say. ahaha)

anyway,
the point is,
many of us tend to neglect the positive side.
there's always two side of things.
the good and the bad.
somehow, we are more focused on the bad side and totally ignore that there is a positive side of everyhthing.
no matter how small it is,
if you acknowledged the positive side,
you'll be more happy.
more motivated.
there's hope everywhere.
you just have to be more openminded to seek for it ( mcm x de kne mngene la pule. but who cares)

in short, be more positive people.
there's no harm in there.

c'mon guys! look on the bright side!! ;P

Quote of the day:
Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.
-Winston Churchill-

Today I am grateful for...
having Averil Coxhead as a tutor. she's bubbly and energetic and her class is fun!we even had morning tea during tutorial today. lucky aye? and for that, Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah.

we all walk in different shoes

While browsing for books for the next TEAP assignment, I've stumbled upon a piece of gem called Happiness and Education by Nel Noddings. Leave it to me to be attracted to books with such title.

Anyway, though there's not much information that's relevant to the assignment, I found these particular paragraphs interesting:

I have argued repeatedly that there is no sound educational reason for forcing all students to study algebra and geometry. Both subjects should, however, be offered to students who need or want them. (Recall also that I suggested that all students should be offered risk-free opportunities to explore these subjects) bla bla bla ...I know that there are students who enjoy the material and do well with it. They are not better than students who hate math and love art; thay are different , and their interest should be satisfied ( I love you Nel!!)

and my favourite part is..

Not all students have an intellectual interest in mathematics, nor is there any reason to insist that they should. Perhaps as many as 20 percent do have such interests, and schools should cultivate their interests without imposing them on everyone else.


Ok. I hate maths.
with all my heart and soul, maths is my least favourite subject in the whole wide world.
haha

well, it's because i dont have an intellectual interest in mathematics.
seriously, i don't.
maths is irrelevant to me.
ok i know that maths is important for development blablabla but hey,
as long as i know how much I spend on my shoppings, that should be enough right?
because I know that I am not interested to be an engineer, doctor etc.
why in the world should i learn about derivation, triangles ect?

I think students should be given more freedom to choose whatever they like to study.
Don't impose your sometimes- riddiculous- norms- and -values on them. i.e people in science streams are so much better than people in arts.
like Nel said, students who love maths are not better than students who hate maths. they are just different.
everyone has different interests and capabilities.
we need not insist that everyone can master a particular intellectual task any more than we would claim than everyone can learn to play the violin skillfully or repair an airplane engine.

sigh.
I had to take add maths in school because I was in the science stream. so that was acceptable.
what's not acceptable is that I had to take Maths as well during A levels.
which was absolutely riddiculous.
Why would you forced a bunch of Tesl students to do maths??
We are going to teach Englissshhhhhh for goodness sake and I think its obvious that Maths are not our forte.
For goodness sake, I took the offer to do A levels mainly because I did not want to have anything to do with maths anymore at matrix
and only to discover that I have to take maths paper in order to continue my degree.
riddiculous aye?
2 years of studying Maths for A levels are equivalent to 2 years of pure pain and torture to me.
when i am not interested in that subject, I wouldnt even put any efforts to that subject until the last minute. haha
needless to say, I have somehow managed to pass the paper. If not, I wouldn't even be here in windy Wellington.
but it saddens me when one of my friends who is really good in English didn't make it through because she flunked her Maths paper.
tragic.
all because of a stupid maths paper which is totally irrelevant to what we're doing now.
sheesh.


the point is, let us choose to learn what we deemed as interesting and important to us.
"students who have genuine intellectual interests derive happiness- even joy- from their engagement with a chosen topic" (Noddings,2003, p. 218)
Teachers and PARENTS should be aware of this.
Based on my observations, if you love your children, don't force them to take something that you want them to do. ask them what they like to do and support their decisions. Then both sides would be happy. (Oh if only Jonathan would read this)


Quote of the day:
Education is not the filling of a pail,
but the lighting of a fire.
-Wiliam Butler Yeats-

Today I am grateful for..
my health. Hey, the exams are just around the corner and it wouldnt be cool if I'm suddenly down with fever :P
Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah.

in a state of normlessness

normlessness.
emile durkheim.
sociology


i'm in a state of normlessness.


sekian.