i have doubts

uncertain

one thing i've learned during this practicum is that you can never be so sure about the future
you can always planned your lessons beforehand
you went all out planning the best lessons, filled with creative activities yada yada
but you can never be so sure that the lesson will be carried out successfully
because you can't predict the kids behaviour
they might be total angles today
but tomorrow they could changed into some unmanageable lil monsters instead

you can never be so sure that you can do exactly like you've planned
there are many factors that affect the students' behaviour such as the weather, time, their workload, what happend in the previous class etc .
something that you have no control over.

the same concept of uncertainty applies to life in general:

-you planned to go out for a jog and suddenly the rain pours in
-you like the blouse and planning to buy it but they don't have it in your size
-you fell in love and planning to have a future together but your family disapproved of that person

there are always unpredictable circumstances that could ruined your plans.
but that doesnt mean that we should not be making any plans at all
we could always plan for the best
but be sure to prepare for the worst.

i'm out in the real world, and i don't like it

not one bit

adjustment period

pic from stuffnoonetoldme

last night I went out with my friends and we've spent hours talking and discussing adulthood: jobs, cars, salaries, loans, houses, marriages etc
it finally occurred to me that I will not be earning as much as they do
i've got a friend who coud afford to buy a semi-d with her income
and it hasn't been a year since she started work
the amount that she will be paying for her house and car would me my total income for the month
imagine that

i have a really hard time trying to adjust with that idea
honestly speaking, i have always been blessed with well, good life
amongst my friends,my family are pretty much well off and i'm used to live in luxury
and now ,
well, let's just say that I will lead a much more humble life than theirs

not to say that I'm not grateful with what I have
indeed, Alhamdulillah
i've been blessed with good fortunes so far.
I also have no intention of competing with others
i mean, why should i?
but I'm just not used to the idea that I will be at the bottom of the strata in terms of my monthly earnings
life sure is full of surprises innit?
who would have thought that things would turned out this way

i need some time to adjust to this idea
and i will be needing more time to adjust myself to live more humbly
or
i could just marry a rich guy :P

at times like this,
i always wonder,
do i have ADHD?

hahahaha

focus sha focus!
and tomorrow you shall be free until August! ^^

gunakanlah bahasa kebangsaan kita. marilah amalkan ramai-ramai

as usual, i have an assignment due soon but what better way to procrastinate than by typing something totally unrelated to the assignment!
and this may be my final i-blog-because-i-don't-want-to-do-my-assignment post
writing this down makes it sound so official!
i'm leaving the land of the long white clouds soon!! aaargh!!! T________________T
i will wrote about leaving sometime soon.i hope. *cough cough*

anyhoo
We had a special guest lecturer for our EPSY 320 : Teachers as lifelong learners class today.
She's our new Student Attache from MSD. she's a graduate form otago uni and has been teaching for 23 years.
amongst her advice to us as beginning teachers were to "go against the system" "keep on making lesson plans" and "sentiasa ikhlaskan diri, remember your rewards at the hereafter".
something else that she said of my interest was about being proud of your nationality. well, she said something about being a Malay but she did mentioned something about being a Malaysian.

now, now
what makes you said that you are a Malaysian?
is it because you were born in Malaysia?
because one of your parent is Malay?
what about the non-Malays?
how can you differentiate Malaysian Chinese from Taiwanese or Malaysian Indian from those from Bangalore?
when you are away from your country, how do you identify other Malaysian?

one important distinguish feature is the ability to speak Bahasa.

Ever heard of the phrase/song "Bahasa Jiwa Bangsa?"
How can you claim that Malaysia is your land, that you are a born and bred Malaysian if you can't even speak in Bahasa?
i'm not saying that you should be able to speak perfect bahasa (hey, i'm even contradicting myself here as I'm writing in English)
But at least you could understand bahasa and could speak fluently
It's okay to speak in your dialect etc as long as you used it.

But our mother tongue has been increasingly forgotten
I have to confess that I do have relatives who couldnt speak/ refused to speak in Bahasa
Some of them speak in English because if they speak in Bahasa they will speak in their regional dialect while some of them just refused to speak in Bahasa.
which is sad, really.

Truth to be told, i was never aware of how special it is to have your own language until some of my classmates mentioned it to me.
You see, those who has only one language i.e English are jealous of us
they are jealous of our language
because that's our identity
and that's the language that only we could understand.
it's special.
it's ours.
hence, it is important to keep on using it
so that it wont die (yes, language can die)

treat Bahasa with respect
appreciate the beauty of the language
it doesn't makes you appear less intelligent if you use perfect Bahasa
you will look sillier if U wrItE liKe DiS

intellectual humility

thanks sarah for introducing this guy
May Allah bless you.